it’s no secret that I have my “moments”. they occur mostly when I’m stressed out. and I’m sorta stressed out now. between my upcoming surgery and having to find a new place to live, I’m an absolute JOY to be around (I am being facetious. obviously). yesterday was another day of house inspections and we looked at four. they were certainly more promising than what we’ve seen previously so I was feeling pretty good. the Brit. oh the Brit. he’s after the “perfect” house. it’s not happening around here unless we want to spend a ridiculous amount of cash and I already think our upper limit is ridiculous. so he’s happy to traipse around the bloomin’ city, looking at houses and filing them away in his head as “references”. I can see us in November, scrambling to find a house to live in and paying a ridiculous $1000 a week for it because we’re running out of time.
so last night I freaked out. I started crying. did I mention I’m PMSing too? not a good time. yeah, so I started crying. and I did that thing where the logical part of me in my head is telling me to shut up and stop being dumb. but i couldnt stop and instead i just cried. the Brit is tried to soothe me and read his book at the same time. I told him that we either (a) stay in our preferred area and up our budget by a hundred or so, or (b) expand our search to west melbourne or (god forbid) Richmond where I found more reasonably priced places. he was totally non-committal and said he was open to both. which made me cry more and then I babbled something about how I hate feeling homeless … something totally dramatic and irrational. and then I fell asleep. and the Brit read his book.
and now it’s morning and the Brit is being REALLY sweet to me. probably doesn’t want the waterworks to start again. he asked me to look at houses in richmond, east melbourne, and west melbourne (around the market). so I started and bookmarked a few but I feel icky about leaving this area. so maybe we’ll wait … and see if something comes up … and I’ll try to be normal.