mid-afternoon musings.

did anyone see Obama’s State of the Union address? more to my point,  did anyone see bobby jindal’s response on behalf of the GOP?  i happened to be home (near death!) so i was able to catch it on the telly.  bobby jindal needs a speech coach or something.  jon stewart on the daily show compared him to Mr. Rogers.  I think he’s exactly like Kenny from 30 Rock.  that’s all i kept thinking about when i was listening to him talk.  poor him.  it’s not easy to follow a speaker like Obama, but then to sound like a dope.  i feel for him.

we had a bit of trivia at the office … only 4 countries have one vowel in them – chad, cypress, egypt, kyrgyzstan.  but isnt’ “y” sometimes a vowel?  especially in those instances,  the ‘y’ makes a vowel sound – so i said that techinically,  chad is the only country.  i argued the point but i got shot down.  boo.

the french guy (yes, he is STILL here) has some shiney new Bose headphones on.  i think he’s listening to Celine Dion.

plans for the weekend include a whole lot of nothin’ and a lot of pajama wearing.  the Brit has to work on sunday so i’ll be on my own.  i’ve recorded some cheesy movies to keep me busy and i guess i’ll do some chores.  if i were the Brit, coming home after working all day and my beautiful wife hasn’t moved from her position on the sofa,  i’d get really narky. thank goodness he’s not at all like that and encourages me to be lazy all day (i swear to god he does.  that’s why he’s so great).  but i can’t help but feel guilty so i’ll do dishes, mop the floor, vacuum…something so it feels like i’m contributing. 

i have to interrupt my train of thought because as i type this,  some of my male co-workers are checking out each other’s back hair.  wtf?  and i’m supposed to take these guys seriously when they want something ASAP? 

ew. can’t think after that. i’ll leave it at that and wish you all a lovely weekend. back on monday.

 

back in the saddle.

my flu has been downgraded to a bad cold after spending most of yesterday in bed,  falling asleep between episodes of judge judy and people’s court.  i’m back at work.  it’s so easy coming to work on a friday because then you have the next two days off.  it’s lovely.  and everyone here missed me (that’s what they’re telling me and i believe them!) so i’m feeling quite good.  i’m sure it’ll wear off by about midday but right now, all is good. 

 

birthday wishes.

i want to wish the husband’s beautiful sister a very happy birthday! i wish we were there, or you were here…or we were together someplace on a tropical island with cocktails in our hands.  love you and miss you sis!

so i’m still sick. possibly worse than i was yesterday.  i actually thought i could go into work today but i’m sitting here and my head feels like it’s going to explode,  my body aches and i’m hot and cold at the same time. not fun.  i’m going home at noon.

all of my favourite comfort foods are banned – chicken noodle soup and ice cream.  i’m eating fake bacon which really isn’t that bad.  the red colour is a bit weird and there are these unidentified green bits in it but i like it.  maybe once my head clears and i regain my full sense of taste i’ll have a different opinion but it was loving them yesterday. 

i’ll be back tomorrow.  i think.

sick day. (for real, bah!)

i’m sick!  i can’t believe it! i have a really bad cold and can’t breath.  Don’t worry blog sister, i don’t think i caught it from you.  it started coming on yesterday afternoon with the sneezes and i was on my way to cold/flu hell.  when i got home, i did an hour on the elliptical hoping to sweat it out.  didn’t work.  by the time the Brit got home,  i was whiney and in full “feel-sorry-for-me” mode. despite my overabundance of snot, sore throat, incessant sneezing, and hacking cough,  i was still bound and determined to make it into work today.  i had a meeting i had already cancelled once (because i wanted to go home early) and i felt bad having to cancel again.  at 11.30pm last night and gave in. i called my manager in sydney i was too sick to come in but i would make it in at 4 to run the meeting (trying to score points with the boss man).  he told me not to worry and to stay home.  SCORE!

i wanted the Brit to stay home and cook me a lovely vegan breakfast but he has this work ethic thing and left me to my own devices.  i cooked myself a fake sausage and fake bacon and a hash brown and settled down for some really bad tv with my box of kleenex. but i was bored! 

how horrible is daytime tv?  the choices are reality shows about why having babies is so great on TLC,  young and the restless, cricket, hallmark movie called “my first time” (wtf?  i looked at the write up, it’s not about what i thought.  lame!), various jerry springer-esque type shows, and that twat jamie oliver cooking up olives and saying “do you know what i mean?” every two seconds.  ick. Law and Order was a rerun and no good movies were on so i thought i’d blog.  so here i am. doing a bit of housekeeping (i can’t disappoint my loyal readers) before i play paper mario on the wii.  i want to finish the game so i can show the Brit all that i accomplished despite being near death.  i’m watching the time though because Clueless is on in an hour and i’ve only seen that movie about ten times. Like totally.

i’ll be back at work tomorrow.  infecting the world with my cooties.  though you know,  you’re contagious before you show symptoms so really i should just stay home again.

good use of skills.

when i get home from work today and the Brit asks me what i spent the day doing,  my response will be
“after finishing my urgent deadlines at noon i spent the day photoshopping colleagues’ heads on other people’s bodies.”  and while normally it is a fun activity,  i am going to hell for sure - even if i’m good for forty days and eat no animal products.  putting their heads on shrek, beavis and butthead, a donkey (don’t ask), and tattoo from fantasy island is surely grounds for dismissal from heaven.

I’ve been focussed on honing my skills and learning about better layout and design and now years later, here i sit,  drawing a moustache and putting a sombrero on our CEO.

A.S.A.P?

i know i whinge about my job all the time.  and lately, i’m just grateful i have a job and it pays well (i guess – that’s me trying to be all “glass half full” and all).  but one thing that really annoys me is that 99.9% of my deadlines are asap.  but what does that really mean?  here is a conversation i had with a colleague about it (this was via email because i try to avoid verbal communication due to my inability to understand the aussie accent…and i don’t like people).

me:  so when do you need that thing done?
x:  asap.
me:  as slow as possible then?
x:  lol.  as SOON as possible.
*notice the bold all caps – which is how it was in his email.  wrong move dude.  it’s on.  and what’s with the “lol.”  he has an annoying laugh and i would’ve heard if he really did LOL.  i know he didn’t.  liar!  and he’s just a wormy little intern.  an intern!?  no way.  oh no he didn’t! (said in my ghetto fab way)* 
me:  okay.  well, i’m on an urgent job at the moment with a real deadline of 8.30am and i have another urgent job with another deadline of 10am.  since you didn’t give me an exact time you want it and are nice enough to say that i can do it as soon as it is possible for me to complete,  let’s say  you’ll have your job back at around noon.  thanks.
x: but i need it now.
me: but you didn’t say now.  you said as soon as possible and now is not possible.  noon is the soonest possible time you can have it.
x: that’s not what i meant
me: but that’s what asap means, right?
x: but that’s not what i  meant.
me: then you should say what you mean and we wouldn’t need to have this discussion.  if you need to chat about it,  you can call me.
x: can i have it now???
me: no.
x: well, i think you’re misinterpreting what asap means.
me:  no, i think you are.  whatever the case, your job will be done at noon.  the longer we have this discussion, the longer it takes for me to complete my work and then your noon deadline will no longer be possible.  thanks.
x:  well, i guess if noon is the soonest it can be done then that’ll have to do.  thanks.
me:  i’m so glad we can get along now.
x: i still think you’re wrong
me:  that’s okay. i won.

but seriously, am i wrong?  i mean i know i was a bit narky, but sheesh.  if they say they want it now, then should just say now or give me some stupidly unreachable deadline so i can say no right away.  i don’t like this circular arguing.  it makes me tired and grouchy.  it drives me to drink i tell you!!

a case of the mondays.

i think i should be sitting at home right now, curled up in a blanket (or not because it’s hot), eating ice cream and watching the Oscars.  but noooo, i’m at work. i just got back from the cafe where i picked up a juice and upon opening it and taking a sip, i realised that it had gone funny.  it has a fermented taste to it which leaves me to wonder if drinking it will make me drunk which sounds appealing.  I have decided against it because (a) i don’t want to be a lush; and (b) i don’t want it to go horribly wrong and i spend the afternoon with an upset tummy.

sh!t, just looked at the time.  i have a meeting now…

 

… yes and i’m back.  pointless.  my doodles are getting better though. i drew a picture of a dragon today.  i autographed it and gave it to a colleague.  when i’m dead, he can sell it for millions. where was i?

ah yes, mondays.  the weekend was nice and uneventful which is how i like it.  we went to the pub on friday and had some bad-for-you dinner and not-so-good-for-you beer.  it was lovely.  and then back to ours for… a cup of tea.  yes my friends, we capped off a late night (10pm) with a cup of tea. we are getting old!

saturday we lazed around, watched an opera.  if you’re curious about opera and might want to try it out,  try to see “elisir d’amour” with pavarotti and kathleen battle from 1991 – amazing. hmm, then  i took a nap and then we watched a movie.  sunday we did the same (except the Brit did house chores – not me).  do you notice a repeating pattern with our weekends?  i don’t mind it so much.  i guess if i were looking at our life from the outisde, i may think “sheesh, they’re boring.  does she own anything besides pajamas?” but i love our life and as long as i get to spend it with the Brit, i’m happy.  hmm, there seems to be no segue to my next topic from that unexpected touching moment…

Lent. Yep, it’s that time of year again.  the only Catholic thing i still do (i don’t count celebrating christmas).  It’s that guilt thing that Catholics are so good at.  whoever went to hell for eating a hamburger on a Friday?  sounds silly i know.  but that’s how it was positioned in my years (and years) of catholic upbringing.  do this or else!  well, i’m not going to take my chances!  no siree!  so each year i give up animal products.  no meat, no dairy, no eggs.  nuthin’.  forty days. (side note-  how come the word “forty” doesn’t have a “u” in it but “four” does?).  starting on wednesday.  i have allowed one day of cheating – march 21st.  the Brit and I are going to the Flower Drum for annivesary dinner and there’s no way i’m missing out. but seriously,  i had no idea how many things had eggs or milk in it until i gave it up.  i’ll pretty much be eating berries and leaves.  it’s not so bad.  it’ll be fine.  but believe me,  i’m going animal product crazy today and tomorrow.  i had a bit of butter on my toast this morning and i don’t even have buttered toast ever!  extra milk in my coffee,  bacon in my sandwich for lunch…  i may have ice cream for dinner followed by a steak for dessert (or the other way around).

and that’s all my news.  trust me, it’ll get more interesting when i’m vegan.  the grouchiness will be upped a few notches and my posts may start to get a slightly more vitriolic.  but you never know. i have the Brit to balance me out. Hope you all had a perfect weekend.

quickie.

i’ve been flat out all day.  i’m just now catching my breath.  but it’s time for home now and i’ve just sent off my last job.  i have lots to tell you…well, not really, but my head is swimming with all sorts of random thoughts which will have to wait til monday.

to my Blog Twin, hope you’re feeling better!  Hope you all have a nice weekend.  Will do my normal rant on monday.

x

remembering how to work.

sooo busy today.  it’s been a long time since we’ve been this busy and i’ve been on cruise control for a few weeks now.  it’s 5pm now and i’ve been sitting here since 7.45am.  crazy right?  that’s why i’m brain damaged. i need to learn to take breaks.

all i want to do is go home but i have to have dinner with my manager tonight.  i suppose i could’ve said no but i like the idea of free meals.  i agreed to go on the stipulation that i can have a glass of wine and i won’t get fired.  he said yes to both so i guess my job is safe still.  he’s itching to go now (the dude is ALWAYS hungry) but i told him i had another 15 minutes of work to do – you know, writing a quick post on my blog and finding out who got voted off american idol).

i’m not made for work.  i should stay home and learn how to knit or something.

okay. gots to go. ’til tomorrow.

x

fake wellies.

The husband told me that a friend of his in London found my wellies for sale at camden market – probably being sold next to a stall selling pet rocks or plant holders made from old socks. The husband thought i’d be annoyed thinking about the fact that there will be people walking around in fake kate spades, not being able to tell the difference between mine and ones that cost twenty quid (i’ll have to scour the markets of st. kilda to make sure that they haven’t infiltrated the australian market).  i have to admit i was bit annoyed (moreso by the smug smile on husband’s face) but it really just reiterates my point about them being cool.  everyone wants them!  further proof that i’m right and the others are wrong.